Here goes nothing

There are about 82,435 reasons I didn't want to create a blog. The list is extensive, but I'll rattle off a few just for fun. Number one- I'm not cool. In a family of 9 awesome people, and 7 dynamic children, I've always kind of felt like the mother hen lame one. Matt and Jackie are big into music, exchanging songs and YouTube videos. They're creative, lively, and hilarious. Jill is wonderful with fashion. A true artist in every sense of the phrase. She knows good colors, shapes, and looks for most everyone. Lots of selfies and high glam shots. Becky and John are both smart, lithe athletes, and Brooke is the glue for everyone. Smart, funny, a great listener, and wise beyond her years. My parents are people every one looks up to and respects, rightfully so. I don't really have a discernible talent or skill, or "this is what I can bring to the table" trick. I listen to old school Whitney and Mariah and Lite FM, and not in an ironic way. I don't like The Beatles, U2, animals, or politics. So there's that.

Number two- I'm not tech savvy at all. Like AT ALL. I use both my laptop and iPad to look at Pinterest, check Facebook, and read magazines. I use my phone to text and let Brooklynne watch pbskids.org. Fun fact- I've never even created a PowerPoint presentation, isn't that crazy?! I always managed to delegate that role to someone else in a group project, and when I needed to make one in college, Cooper was so annoyed with how long it took me to mess around with the settings, he just did them for me. Lest you think I was a slacker or worked my then boyfriend to the bone, I proofread and edited all of his papers- he totally got the better end of the deal. When I asked if words could whirl in, or letters could drop from the top of the slide or sound effects could be added, and he simply said "Not a chance," without looking away from the screen, I think that was our line in the sand moment; if it had to do with computers, it was Cooper's job. I also don't take very many pictures. I mean, I have 1,417 of Brooklynne on my phone currently (that's the real number, and I'm guessing it's also the reason my phone dies twice a day) but as far as the real DSLR, twist the lens camera, notsomuch. I've since found out you can use said phone pictures in blog posts, so we're good.

Lastly, I kind of didn't want to invite people into my life, without it being invitation worthy. I kept thinking, "as soon as our house is finished, I'll start the blog." Or "as soon as I have something more to report than Brooklynne and Mommy at the park, Brooklynne and Mommy doing sidewalk chalk, Brooklynne and Mommy watching Fresh Beat Band, then I'll totally blog. Not one thing going on today is noteworthy." I don't want people to know what I'm feeling, or thinking deep down. I would rather just keep Facebook life up. Cute, quippy posts and a picture of my sweet Birdie girl, and no one is the wiser as to what's really happening with me. Full honest self is scary. I've been different people at different times, as all of us have. I wanted to keep my favorite self- my funny, witty, charming self at the forefront. Not "hard Mom days" self, or "searching for something unknown" self; those aren't fun or cute. So I kind of hid. And I'm just now realizing that's not fair- to myself or to those that love me. I want to write down and remember my feelings and thoughts as they are right now, as a gift to myself. Just because it's not perfect, doesn't mean it's not important.

I felt God tugging at me to do this, to step out and be vulnerable, but as usual, I gave him reasons why now just wasn't the perfect time. I rationalized and talked myself out of it for years. And because I'm the type of person that needs huge sweeping gestures and really obvious signs when I'm to do something out of my comfort zone, I had no less than 5 separate people tell me to start blogging.

So I'm blogging.

I don't know what this will be, or how often I'll post, but I'm excited to be doing it!

Then I got to worrying about a name. I know, mountains out of teeny tiny ant hills, right? And then it dawned on me- Hangin' with Mr. Cooper. One, because that's what I'm doing most of the time. And two, because I really loved that show as a kid. I thought Holly Robinson Peete was so beautiful and I wanted to have a little teeny waist when I grew up so I could wear super high waisted acid wash jeans, just like her. And Mark Cooper's suits were fly. I yelled out to Cooper "I'm naming my blog Hangin' with Mr. Cooperrrrrrrr," in the same way Kevin yelled out to Buzz that he was in his room and going through his stuff- he wasn't home, and I knew he wouldn't like it. Cooper is selfless and quiet. The ultimate introvert. He prefers watching and listening to being front and center any day. But I did it because he's my man, and I'm going to celebrate him. By the way, the Buzz and Kevin reference is from Home Alone. If you didn't know that, or appreciate it, you might be in the wrong place : )

To all that I say, here goes nothing.